tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post116720847503437358..comments2023-10-18T04:52:43.144-04:00Comments on Autism's Edges: Add, Bad, Cad, Dad, Fad, Had, Lad, Mad, Pad, SadMothersVoxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02479178355207142195noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-26954184408162225652007-03-16T23:20:00.000-04:002007-03-16T23:20:00.000-04:00sorry to keep opening up this thread but i have en...sorry to keep opening up this thread but i have encountered this even with a (college) student/friend (disabled) who has trouble making same-age friends mong "normies". and what jannalou said reminded me of <A HREF="http://normemma.com/arhellbe.htm" REL="nofollow">this page</A> maybe she was thinking of it as well? i think it's really important that REAL (quality and EQUALITY of relationships) n.https://www.blogger.com/profile/17677317372343868030noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1170970564513761002007-02-08T16:36:00.000-05:002007-02-08T16:36:00.000-05:00I completely struggle with the same thing. I'm su...I completely struggle with the same thing. I'm supposed to socialize my baby, so that he will feel isolated when he's not accepted as being weird, rather than his current completeness that exists without anybody else? At what point is "socialization" just a prejudice by a bunch of people who can't imagine being alone and liking it?<BR/><BR/>If you are worried, I will tell you what my son's Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1168969704270254372007-01-16T12:48:00.000-05:002007-01-16T12:48:00.000-05:00We are having the same issue with my AS DS (7 yrs ...We are having the same issue with my AS DS (7 yrs old). Reading your conversation with M, is like replaying conversations I have had with my DS. :) <BR/>We have decided (for now) to let him have his time alone at recess, without an SLP or EA directing his social interaction. <BR/>He is not sad about being alone, and would rather do his own thing.<BR/><BR/>I also find that as he gets older, he Dana Kuzmanovski, M.Ed., BCBAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08432820244300045756noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1168223778078195792007-01-07T21:36:00.000-05:002007-01-07T21:36:00.000-05:00Meh.I wanted friends when I was little but didn't ...Meh.<BR/><BR/>I wanted friends when I was little but didn't have the ability to make them. I had a few, but spent recess doing my own thing for the most part.<BR/><BR/>If Sweet M is happy as she is, I don't think she should be pushed. A speech therapist "facilitating" interaction at recess will probably end up more along the lines of "teaching peers how to help", which is - to be perfectly Jannalouhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16013268003390172957noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167843628534883292007-01-03T12:00:00.000-05:002007-01-03T12:00:00.000-05:00It seems kids do hit an age where they are a lot l...It seems kids do hit an age where they are a lot less tolerant of differences. For Megan, this started in grades 3 and 4. Girls become less interested in ponies and Disney and get more into "relationships" (and a lot of the catty behavior too). Luckily, Megan has a few friends who accept her interests (as they are probably still interested in some of the same things themselves). There is another KathyIggyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11699911427332930599noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167700535848938612007-01-01T20:15:00.000-05:002007-01-01T20:15:00.000-05:00i wonder if the other kids hit an age where it's s...i wonder if the other kids hit an age where it's somehow "normal" to disconnect from kids like M? that would be too bad, that would be their loss...n.https://www.blogger.com/profile/17677317372343868030noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167604754405700842006-12-31T17:39:00.000-05:002006-12-31T17:39:00.000-05:00Thanks everyone, for your thoughts on all of this....Thanks everyone, for your thoughts on all of this. I think the consensus here is that having an SLP help integrate Sweet M into the recess activities is probably not the wisest thing to do. <BR/><BR/>I like what Kyra said about having relating to others be something that comes out of one's own deepest sense of development.<BR/><BR/>The only thing that sort of hangs me up about that is that MothersVoxhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02479178355207142195noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167451016726887842006-12-29T22:56:00.000-05:002006-12-29T22:56:00.000-05:00i meant something like what SquareGirl said but sh...i meant something like what SquareGirl said but she said it much nicer.<BR/><BR/>sorry for perhaps excess negativity. i bet SweetM is a really cool little person, i just don't have a whole lot of optimism about her 'peers' GETTING that important piece of information.<BR/><BR/>i hope i might be wrong though. that would be cool.n.https://www.blogger.com/profile/17677317372343868030noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167438325105286002006-12-29T19:25:00.000-05:002006-12-29T19:25:00.000-05:00i think kristina is right on this: you captured th...i think kristina is right on this: you captured the paradox perfectly. <BR/><BR/>who am i to say? but since i am weighing in, i'll say that RDI has been the thing that has 'grown' organic interest in interacting with other kids in my son and in the kids of other parents i know who are interweaving this style of parenting/interacting into their lives. it's a slow and steady thing, not a CRiSIS Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167357129882005992006-12-28T20:52:00.000-05:002006-12-28T20:52:00.000-05:00Oh I hated recess!! And I don't see how having an...Oh I hated recess!! And I don't see how having an SLP with Sweet M at recess is going to help her form peer relationships (just my own opinion, not to be taken too seriously). I had a couple friends through grade school, but don't think I made meaningful friendships that were genuine until college because I was able to associate with people who had similar interests than mine. And now, when I Alanahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03316244154670854155noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167285168855359522006-12-28T00:52:00.000-05:002006-12-28T00:52:00.000-05:00Maybe sweet M would get along better in the cont...Maybe sweet M would get along better in the context of 'her space', with someone a bit older (less likely to be a jerk) and also on the spectrum. A lot of high schools have Aspie/PDD students, of course, who need to do x number of hours service...or even a college autie. <BR/><BR/>Someone who isn't going to stoop to her because of her language challenges, basically. A 'big sister' kinda thing.Neurodivergent Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02815685510033244185noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167269618190592572006-12-27T20:33:00.000-05:002006-12-27T20:33:00.000-05:00i may be thinking wrong age-group here, but i thin...i may be thinking wrong age-group here, but i think if you need a speech-therapist to make you able to get friends, you are never going to be considered 'friend material' by the most narrowminded of the normal kids (which could be a majority). <BR/>i think if you are strange, then you are strange, and you maybe need to wait for other strange kids to show up that you can hang out with. with me, n.https://www.blogger.com/profile/17677317372343868030noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167269501532209102006-12-27T20:31:00.000-05:002006-12-27T20:31:00.000-05:00Thanks everyone. I'm thinking very hard about thi...Thanks everyone. I'm thinking very hard about this one because I just don't know which way to go with it.MothersVoxhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02479178355207142195noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167254248556307492006-12-27T16:17:00.000-05:002006-12-27T16:17:00.000-05:00Well, speaking from personal experience I recall n...Well, speaking from personal experience I recall not being interested in a lot of the activities my classmates seemed to enjoy. <BR/><BR/>Recess was the worst -- I saw no point in activities like kickball and would have much preferred, and benefitted from, the opportunity to sit by myself and read, play, decompress, etc. <BR/><BR/>I was referred to school counsellors repeatedly in part because Zilarihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14180692415604127726noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167224425519172272006-12-27T08:00:00.000-05:002006-12-27T08:00:00.000-05:00I remember recess at school - I would stand by the...I remember recess at school - I would stand by the door, one with a glassy, reflective surface encased by steel, and look at all the children on the other side of the "looking glass". It would seem, some opening the door, as if they´d have entered a mirror world. Only there were they interesting. If I looked at the actual courtyard I´d soon turn away because the people that I saw there were not Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167223392793912712006-12-27T07:43:00.000-05:002006-12-27T07:43:00.000-05:00This is an extremely good question. Sometimes it ...This is an extremely good question. Sometimes it is helpful to have a friend, even one you don't necessarily like (if you know what I mean). Friends serve as allies when your picked on at school. Friends don't have to be classmates but could be someone outside of school. Does M gravitate towards certain types of children? My son always seems to pick out the other children who are different.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19421951.post-1167212244555042652006-12-27T04:37:00.000-05:002006-12-27T04:37:00.000-05:00"Id" words next---that would be bid, did, hid, kid..."Id" words next---that would be bid, did, hid, kid, lid, mid, rid, Sid.....<BR/><BR/>You capture "the autism parent paradox" in a nutshell: Do or don't? Stay or go?<BR/><BR/>We enjoy the emptied city too. (Though we're far away.)<BR/><BR/>Peace and joy!kristinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01104388229716638534noreply@blogger.com